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Argument races over 'Tiger Mom' style

0 CommentsPrint E-mail CNTV, March 6, 2011
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A debate is continuing in the US over how strict parents should be with their children. Is it better to be a "Tiger Mom," who focuses on discipline, some ask, or is it fine to be more accepting of mistakes? Jeff Napshin speaks with a group of Washington area moms and dads to get their reaction to the controversy.

Go to any high school in America and you'll find every kind of kid -- from smart and successful -- to lazy and downright rude. So are parents doing enough to discipline their children and prepare them for the real world?

"I think it's important for kids to understand that it's okay to make a mistake.You don't have to be perfect. And if you learn from that, you come out as a more mature person."

"Especially for teenagers they need boundaries, and to know what consequences are, need to know what's expected."

As you might imagine -- their children see things a bit differently.

"Sometimes the way they think of it, in their minds, and you think of it in your minds, is a lot different, and so you see it differently."

"A lot of times my parents take away my things I like to use, in order to get me to stay on task, and not have too much free time to do homework and study more."

"We gathered this group of parents and students from Fairfax County, Virginia -- a wealthy suburb of Washington, DC -- where an emphasis is placed on achievement and success."

They're all talking about the controversy -- which stems from the recent release of Amy Chua's new book -- "Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother." In it, she promotes what she calls "Traditional Chinese Parenting." Children must excel in school, can not play until their work is done, and must be disciplined until they achieve the correct results. So what do educators think about it?

"I think it's a great way to sell books but it's not a great way to raise kids."

Kristen Amundson is with Education Sector -- a non-profit education think tank. She believes the best way to teach children is somewhere between being a strict Tiger Mom, and an overly permissive parent.

"The best is the parent who sets clear limits, but combines that with warmth."

She says the danger of being a Tiger Mom is that children could reject the parent ... along with their parenting.

Virginia is of Chinese descent, and sees both sides of the controversy.

"Western cultures believe there children should be nurtured. And that it's okay to make mistakes. But in Eastern cultures, they practice until they're perfect, and you can tell from the Olympics."

She believes that, in some ways, America is falling behind other parts of the world. But says our emphasis on creativity is what makes us successful.

And other moms say making a mistake isn't really so bad -- it just makes us human.

"If you stumble and can pick yourself up. Answer to it, and say you're sorry, and keep going then you actually have succeeded."

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